FROM MOM TO SON

writing

Does this mom get a bit carried away with her idioms?  Have fun with this “idiomatic” mom.

**************

Dear Son, my own flesh and blood:

To see you would be a sight for sore eyes.  You are the heart of my heart.

So you have a gut feeling your boss is about to give you a kick in the teeth? He didn’t like it when you were caught red handed, then had a slip of the tongue and called him a pain in the neck?  That put his nose out of joint, you say?

If he’s giving you a cold shoulder and you are not seeing eye to eye, you might not get the promotion you’ve had your eyes on.  Just keep your nose to the grindstone, your shoulder to the wheel, keep a stiff upper lip, stay on your toes, and keep your fingers crossed.  It certainly won’t help to put your foot in your mouth,  get cold feet or say something that gets you in over your head. Maybe he is just pulling your leg.  If you keep your eyes open, your chin up, offer to lend him a hand,  and work your fingers to the bone you might keep the job by the skin of your teeth if you’re not weak-kneed, rubber-spined or thick-headed.

Have you had your head in the clouds and do you wear your heart on your sleeve or have you been crying your heart out?  A good rule of thumb is to wash your hands of your pride, beg his mercy, pat yourself on the back, go back to your neck of the woods, let your hair down, and play it by ear.  But be prepared for your blood to boil if he chooses to just step over your dead body.

I just wanted to speak my mind and get this off my chest.  My lips are sealed, and I’m here to help you face the music.  You’re my heart’s delight.  I’ve loved you, warts and all, since you were wet behind the ears.  I’d give an arm and leg for you. Now have a cookie for your sweet tooth, take the weight off your shoulders, relax and keep your head above the water.

Meanwhile, hang on to that job with all four feet, grow some hair on your chest, get some iron in your blood, and grow nerves of steel, come to your senses, dig your heels in, and use some elbow grease, ‘cause, make no bones about it,  you can’t bring your lazy carcass to my couch, feed your face at my table, and spin your hard luck stories in my ears.  You will not be a yoke on my back. If you plan to be here under my nose I will wash my hands of you.

From your bone weary but loving mother

*************

Image: Pixabay

About oneta hayes

ABOUT ME Hello. To various folks I am Neat’nee, Mom, Grandma Neta, Gramma, Aunt Neta, Aunt Noni, Aunt Neno, and Aunt Neto (lots of varieties from little nieces and nephews). To some I’m more like “Didn’t you used to be my teacher?” or “Don’t I know you from someplace?” To you, perhaps, I am a Fellow Blogger. Not “fellow” like a male or a guy, but “fellow” like a companion or an adventurer. I would choose to be Grandma Blogger, and have you pull up a chair, my website before you, while I tell you of some days of yore. I have experienced life much differently than most of you. It was and is a good life. I hope to share nuggets of appreciation for those who have gone before me and those who come after me. By necessity you are among those who come after me and I will tell you of those who came before. Once upon a time in a little house on a prairie - oops, change that lest I commit plagiarism - and change that “house on the prairie” to “dugout on the prairie.” So my story begins...
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17 Responses to FROM MOM TO SON

  1. Salvageable says:

    That’s great, Oneta! J.

  2. pranabaxom says:

    Sound advise and well said. Laughing. Sad but so true.

    • oneta hayes says:

      I had forgotten this. I also enjoyed the re-read. 😀

      • pranabaxom says:

        😊😊How does it feel re-reading at a mature age compared to writing in a younger age😂

        • oneta hayes says:

          I made no changes on this. Actually I think I wrote this when I posted before (2016). I remember sitting right here and having fun with it. I don’t know what triggered the thought. Maybe someone in Toast Masters got criticized for too many trite expressions. I’m pretty sure I did not use it for a speech though. Before blogging I pretty much only wrote for TM speeches. I started that after retirement. So most of what I write/wrote is triggered by you all, dear bloggers. I did my serious stuff on the names of Jesus about 2003/4 when I wrote my doctoral manuscript. When I re-read it, it feels a bit – I don’t know the word to use. I feel a bit sad, a bit of a loss that I do not research and depend on Him like I used to. I have been teaching a Sunday class all these years and do a lot of research but it has not been the same. I’ve just completed the study of Isaiah. I resigned the class last Sunday. Another “put away” because of age (hearing loss) that I will miss. Hey, Pranab, you caught me in a mood, didn’t you. I want you to know it is wonderful to grow old (with eternity in mind) but I do hate having to put aside some things I have loved.

  3. Cindy says:

    HAHAHA!!! Love it!

  4. atimetoshare.me says:

    Absolutely hilarious, with grains of truth everywhere❤️

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