holding hands

Hope you enjoy this rerun.  It is near the top of all my posts as far as likes and comments.  I still get a kick out of it.  Come and grow old with me.


How humiliating!  I had to hold my husband’s hand as we walked to the car this morning.  Now we’ve been married and I have held my dear husband’s hand for 63 years with pleasure, many miles I’m sure and enjoyed each mile of it, but that was when I didn’t have to hold his hand.  I assure you there is a vast difference in holding hands and in having to hold hands.

Situation was this:  My eighty-six year old husband, Sammy,  and I went out to eat breakfast at the Mason Lodge Fundraiser for the Senior Center.  The following is reason for my agitation.

  1. We went in separate vehicles. I didn’t care about where he parked because he is fit as a fiddle and runs most anywhere he goes.

  2. did care about where I parked. But I still had to go to the back forty to find a place.  I got out of the car, couldn’t even see the entrance door, so I looked at my cane over in the passenger seat.  Looked for the entrance again.  It hadn’t moved any closer.  Looked at the cane in the passenger seat again.  Could I manage without it?  Which is preferable:  to waddle with a cane, or to double-waddle without it?

  1. I remind myself I’m at a fundraiser for Senior Citizens. Surely others will have canes.  My “without-cane” waddle is pretty bad and besides I might fall.  I take the cane.

  2. Yes, there were others with canes. That made it worse.  They were all old people with canes and waddles, some even had a waddling canes!  What if younger people saw me with them!  My hair is not gray.  Maybe they would think I was post accident not pre accident.  If I had borrowed Sammy’s workout jacket, they might think I had just stretched a muscle.

  3. I ditched the cane on the back of a chair as soon as I found an empty one. It was much more age appropriate for me to hang onto the back of all the chairs as I waddled to the food line.

  4. I believe holding a full plate of biscuits, gravy, eggs, hash-browns, pancake, and sausage strengthened me. Fortified by the outlook of food and with the determination that I was not going to drop that plate, I was able to walk slowly and gracefully back to the chair where my cane waited unused.  At least I walked slowly and steadily—didn’t want to jiggle my food together.

  5. Friends sat with us. Good food.  Good visiting.  I only asked Sammy to go for one refill of gravy for me.  He hopped right up, got a bowl of gravy for me.  I shared it with him and a friend.  Others might not have noticed that he was getting the gravy for me.

  6. Finally it is bye-bye, time to go. After friends left, I retrieved the cane and headed down the aisle.  With cane in my right hand, Sammy took my left.  We both tried to ignore the cane.  Before we left, a friend gave me a gift of a candle.  Sweet of her but I didn’t have a third hand!  Sammy had two hands  – one free of me so he carried the candle in it.  He went to my car with me—he walked, I waddled, but I was able to keep my cane from waddling.

True to our sixty-three years together, he assured himself that I was safely in the car, kissed me bye, and dashed back to his vehicle.

I surely must have done something right.  I made no mistake when I fluttered my eyelashes at him when I was eighteen.


About oneta hayes

ABOUT ME Hello. To various folks I am Neat’nee, Mom, Grandma Neta, Gramma, Aunt Neta, Aunt Noni, Aunt Neno, and Aunt Neto (lots of varieties from little nieces and nephews). To some I’m more like “Didn’t you used to be my teacher?” or “Don’t I know you from someplace?” To you, perhaps, I am a Fellow Blogger. Not “fellow” like a male or a guy, but “fellow” like a companion or an adventurer. I would choose to be Grandma Blogger, and have you pull up a chair, my website before you, while I tell you of some days of yore. I have experienced life much differently than most of you. It was and is a good life. I hope to share nuggets of appreciation for those who have gone before me and those who come after me. By necessity you are among those who come after me and I will tell you of those who came before. Once upon a time in a little house on a prairie - oops, change that lest I commit plagiarism - and change that “house on the prairie” to “dugout on the prairie.” So my story begins...
This entry was posted in aging, humor, long marriage, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to CANE PAIN

  1. A gallant gentleman— nothing finer 🥰

  2. What a sweet love story! No, you made no mistake. ❤

  3. Faye says:

    Lovely story. My only sure and solid foundation is the Lord. Having to use a cane (mercifully not yet necessary but I do have two). is not a problem for me. I even have one specially for very tall ladies and it allows you to stand up straight and keep your focus ahead. Last year I thought it may be necessary. This year, my daughter seems more in need of it than myself. Seasons of change and learning to ‘go with the flow’. Your Sammy is a gentleman. My David is too but I think he would say ‘why don’t you use the cane?’ You are no longer a spring chicken, my dear.!

  4. Sweet and precious and funny! Thank you so much for sharing this I am now on crutches due to bone-on-bone arthritis and I go about trying to leave the crutches behind and hide my waddle…both painful and silly…but my hair hasn’t turned grey yet and I hate to look like I NEED the crutches!

    • oneta hayes says:

      Using a cane that you don’t really need wouldn’t be so bad, would it. People are so kind; they hold doors for you and all that nice stuff so the cane is rather handy – if you didn’t really HAVE to have it. 😀

  5. Bhagyashree says:

    What a sweet story! I am sure you guys look cute as a couple. 😘😍

    • oneta hayes says:

      Thank you. The years do roll on fast. It has been so long I can’t remember “me” without him. I went to your blog but I find e-mail enrollment. I only check the follow that is handled by Word Press. Maybe this is a different format for them, but I don’t do direct email contacts. Whatever that means! 😀 I called them about it one time. They told me there would either be a “follow” button or a icon in the lower right corner. I didn’t find either. Maybe I will get updated sometime.

  6. Bhagyashree says:

    That’s strange. I distinctly remember that there is Word press follow button in the lower part of the main page of my blog. I never knew problems like this existed. 😅Maybe you could try clicking on the main page of my blog. Anyways, thanks! 😊

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s