‘TIS THE SEASON

Posted on December 19, 2020 by oneta hayes

‘Tis the season to be jolly

Drop donut crumbs and spill the coffee!

“Alas, alas,” the new carpet cried,

“Somebody do something,”  –  So the church board tried.

Got out their pens and with much chagrin

Wrote “Fifteen Rules for All to Heed”

But, alas, again!

The people in that congregation

Could not, would not, did not read.

Well, the pastor made a recommendation

Call the King James Council of Arbitration.

After much negotiation, with relief and much elation.

They passed the following decree

And posted it for all to see.

“Thou shalt carry thy coffee in steady cup,

Lo! Thou shalt balance it carefully to keep it up.

And, thou shalt not tread on thy gooey bread.”

“Give it to us in NIV,” responded the Refreshment Committee.

Still the problem had not been solved.

Who should be involved?  What should be resolved?

“What shall we do about dropping crumbs,

Slopping coffee, and sticky goo?”

So the problem was given to the Common Sense Board

And, all together, in one accord,

They put on their thinking hats,

Submitted one rule.  “DON’T DO THAT!

About oneta hayes

ABOUT ME Hello. To various folks I am Neat’nee, Mom, Grandma Neta, Gramma, Aunt Neta, Aunt Noni, Aunt Neno, and Aunt Neto (lots of varieties from little nieces and nephews). To some I’m more like “Didn’t you used to be my teacher?” or “Don’t I know you from someplace?” To you, perhaps, I am a Fellow Blogger. Not “fellow” like a male or a guy, but “fellow” like a companion or an adventurer. I would choose to be Grandma Blogger, and have you pull up a chair, my website before you, while I tell you of some days of yore. I have experienced life much differently than most of you. It was and is a good life. I hope to share nuggets of appreciation for those who have gone before me and those who come after me. By necessity you are among those who come after me and I will tell you of those who came before. Once upon a time in a little house on a prairie - oops, change that lest I commit plagiarism - and change that “house on the prairie” to “dugout on the prairie.” So my story begins...
This entry was posted in Christmas, church, humor, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

21 Responses to ‘TIS THE SEASON

  1. pranabaxom says:
    December 19, 2020 at 11:52 am

    Don’t do committee?
    Congregation did not have amity,
    They couldn’t read,
    Must be a very special breed,
    Lightning and brimstone they need,
    But they just decided to drink and eat,
    Management can now just sit and weep.

    Reply
  2. Julie (aka Cookie) says:
    December 19, 2020 at 11:55 am

    Share this with the Government— it should be their mantra

    Reply
  3. atimetoshare.me says:
    December 19, 2020 at 12:09 pm

    Haha I love this❤️❤️

    Reply
  4. Frank Hubeny says:
    December 19, 2020 at 12:56 pm

    I liked that summary rule. 🙂

    Reply
  5. insanitybytes22 says:
    December 19, 2020 at 3:13 pm

    LOL! Love it, Oneta. Very clever and funny, too! If churches would just put in coffee-colored carpets we wouldn’t have these issues. Or I suppose people could start taking better care…..nah, that will never happen.

    Reply
  6. Faye says:
    December 19, 2020 at 3:35 pm

    Clever and witty and deep comment. ALL institutions etc, NEW Covenant NOW. Christ alone is ETERNAL KING. A-men. Our coffee cups are ringed with LIGHT and our Christmas remembrances can ring with laughter. Thank you Oneta.

    Reply
  7. dumbestblogger says:
    December 19, 2020 at 4:06 pm

    I’m glad they got it figured out.

    Reply
  8. shoreacres says:
    December 19, 2020 at 7:51 pm

    Just delightful, Oneta. I was visiting with a friend who was raised in Oklahoma the past couple of days, and discovered that her sister was named — Oleta! I wonder what other ‘O’ variations might be around?

    Reply
    • oneta hayes says:
      December 19, 2020 at 10:32 pm

      I met someone recently whose name was Oveta, I think. I remember spelling the name back to her. I think it was “v”. Glad you enjoy my piece of frivolity. Have a great Christmas week with special joy on Christmas Day.

      Reply
  9. larry trasciatti says:
    December 20, 2020 at 1:21 pm

    Christmas brings crowds even in our current pandemic, and crowds bring annoyance

    Reply
    • oneta hayes says:
      December 20, 2020 at 2:44 pm

      Christian crowds leave less mess, than the “Woodstock” kind. I was out a bit yesterday; I saw a new litter problem – used face masked thrown in the curb. I guess the wearer put them on to go in a store then trash them via the curb.

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Cancel

Connecting to %s